REFOCUS
Use the first verse of Psalm 27 as an affirmation. Focus your thoughts on it alone as you breath deeply, repeating it several times. “The Lord is my light and my salvation whom shall I fear?”
READ
Psalm 27:1-3
The Lord is my light and my salvation—
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life—
of whom shall I be afraid?
2 When the wicked advance against me
to devour me,
it is my enemies and my foes
who will stumble and fall.
3 Though an army besiege me,
my heart will not fear;
though war break out against me,
even then I will be confident.
REFLECT
Hope and Honesty
I once heard a policeman tell about coming upon a roadside accident. A car had run off the road and flipped in a nearby ditch. He could see that the driver had been thrown out of the car and lay beside it. As he approached, he heard the driver praying. From the slurred tone he surmised that liquor was involved.
With each passing minute the driver grew louder in his petition. “Lord,” he cried in an inebriated voice, “help this accident not to have happened!”
I understand. There are many times I’ve wished that things were different than they are. Times when I’ve wished something had not happened. But wishes are not prayers. Prayer starts with reality. When things are bad it doesn’t seek to ignore or escape from the truth nor does it engage in magical thinking or fantasy. Instead, it builds on the realization of just how bad things are, sharing them with One who can understand and help.
Like any relationship, it requires honesty. We see this kind of transparency in the prayers of the Bible where there is no attempt to sugarcoat the severity of loss and pain. The main characters, other than God, Himself are portrayed in vivid clarity – warts and all.
At the same time, a truthful assessment of a situation doesn’t end with the feeling and reality of devastation. It also seeks to see through the pain and factor into the future what remains good in the situation. Moreover, in sharing the situation with God, hope is automatically injected into it, because He is good.
As we see in the Psalm above, though the Psalmist predicts various disasters, he is still able to remain confident. His prayer includes the belief that God can use even the worst of situations. That conviction allows us to pray with both honesty and hope.
Interestingly enough, research shows that people who are able to accept the reality of what they face, both acknowledging the hardship and embracing that the event still has meaning, are those who are best able to recover from tragedy. Referred to as “realistic optimism” this characteristic provides a way to find both comfort and strength. It produces both the endurance to move through the tragedy and the hope to move out of it.
When bad things happen we are often tempted in one of two directions. One is to seek to escape the pain by denying parts of reality. When we do this the situation and its cause remain dormant and undealt with, ready to emerge again. The other temptation is to engage in “either/or thinking.” That is, we may describe something as a lost cause or a failure. The result will be that soon we will give up in despair.
Talking to God in prayer can help with both of these. When we are confronted by difficulty, prayer’s beginning work is honest assessment. It involves opening our lives up to a God who understands. It begins with finding the courage to confront the situation head on and allow God to bring comfort to real pain. It also grows as we look for and choose to believe that good can be brought out of what may even seem hopeless.
Like the drunken driver, some use prayer as a dodge to keep reality at bay. But real and transforming prayer is done by sharing our life with God with all its struggles and trusting Him with it. Honesty and hope are the well-spring of resilience.
RESPOND
Questions to Consider
- Which is the easiest for you – being open about your difficulties with God or believing that God will work them for good?
- What causes you difficulties in being a realistic optimist?
- Who do you know that you would describe as a “realistic optimism?” What might they say to you about your life?
Prayer
Almighty God,
I open my life to you
with all of its weaknesses, struggles, failures and pain.
I open my life to you
with all its gifting, strength and potential –
even that which is yet unknown to me.
Help me not deny or run from any of life set before me.
Save me from choosing the easy and false “hope” of denying what is.
Save me from denying the hope that is there
Let me hold firm to honest hope
As I hold fast to You
The God of both Truth and Power
Blessings,
Rev. James R. Needham, PhD, MDiv