The Downward Path to Growth
By denying their pain, avoiding the necessary falling, many have kept themselves from their own spiritual depths—and therefore have been kept from their own spiritual heights. First-half-of-life religion is almost always about various types of purity codes or “thou shalt nots” to keep us up, clear, clean, and together, like good Boy and Girl Scouts. A certain kind of purity and self-discipline is “behovely,” at least for a while, in the first half of life, as the Jewish Torah brilliantly presents. (I was a Star Scout and a Catholic altar boy myself, and did them both quite well, but it made me love me, not God.) Because none of us desires, seeks, or even suspects a downward path to growth through imperfection, we have to get the message with the authority of a divine revelation. So, Jesus makes it into a central axiom: The last really do have a head-start in moving toward first and those who spend too much time trying to be first will never get there. Jesus says this clearly in several places and in numerous parables, although those of us still on the first journey just cannot hear it. It is far too counterintuitive and paradoxical. Our resistance to the message is so great that it could be called outright denial, even among sincere Christians. The human ego prefers anything, just about anything, to falling or changing or dying. The ego is that part of us that loves the status quo, even when it is not working. + Adapted from Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life, pp. xxiii–xxiv.
—Richard Rohr, Yes, And…: Daily Meditations
We often resist pain and avoid anything that feels like falling—yet in doing so, we can keep ourselves from the very depth and height God wants for us. Early faith can focus on rules and “staying good,” but Jesus’ teaching flips this on its head: the last will be first, and those who cling to being first may never arrive. This is not the path our egos choose—it feels too much like loss, failure, or dying.
But in God’s Kingdom, the downward path is where transformation happens. Letting go of perfection, success, or the need to appear “together” opens us to a deeper love for God and others. The ego resists change, preferring the comfort of the familiar—even if it’s not working. True growth often begins when we stop clinging to the top and allow God to meet us at the bottom, lifting us into a life we couldn’t reach any other way. —DH
—David Hoskins, Founder & Care Guide, Sanctuary Clinics